Thursday, October 13, 2005

Memory condmens.

Mr. Headache was looking through the windowpane. His face partially iluminated by a half-price candle, her face partially iluminated by the glimpse of memory.

Through the windowpane: Blackness.

A lighting broke the sky in half. Neighbor's red roses crushed, anihilated by yesterday's hailstorm. He saw the massacre in a silvery second.

-Hmm.

He sipped the one-liter bottle beer while pressing quickly and accurately RANDOM and PLAY on the Walkman. He looked at the dim light of the candle.

-Won't be needing this- he whispered as he compressed the flame between his finger and thumb.

If only I could do the same thing with memories.

Blackness.
Through the windowpane: Her face.

-I don't need this... I'm fine now.- he lied out loud to himself closing his eyes. -I'm fine now- he repeated. He opened his eyes again: Her face.

I don't WANT it, he thought as he drank the beer with a sudden thirst.

A 4 minutes and thirty-two seconds song began to play quietly.

Fucking random, he thought and smiled. His smile looked like the final twist of a dying dirt worm.

He pressed the REPEAT button twice. He lit a cigarette and turned it up, listening:

Only (NIN)

I'm becoming less defined, as days go by
Fading away, well you might say I'm losing focus
Kind of drifting into the abstract in terms of how I see myself
Sometimes, I think I can see right through myself
Sometimes, I think I can see right through myself

Sometimes, I can see right through myself

Less concerned, about fitting into the world
Your world that is, cause it doesn't really matter anymore
(No, it doesn't really matter anymore)
No, it doesn't really matter anymore
None of this shit really matters anymore
Yes, I am alone, but then again I always was
As far back as I can tell, I think maybe it's because
Because you were never really real to begin with
I just made you up to hurt myself
I just made you up to hurt myself
Yeah, and I just made you up to hurt myself I just made you up to hurt myself
Yeah, and I just made you up to hurt myself
And it WORKED
Yes it did!

There is no you, there is only me
There is no you, there is only me
There is no fucking you, there is only me
There is no fucking you, there is only me
Only..........Only............Only.........Only...
Well, the tiniest little dot caught my eye
And it turned out to be a scab
And I had this funny feeling
Like I just knew it's something bad

I just couldn't leave it alone

Picking at that scab... It was a doorway trying to seal itself shut
But I climbed through
Now I'm somewhere I am not supposed to be
And I can see things I know I really shouldn't see
And now I know why now, now I know why

Things aren't as pretty on the inside

There is no you, there is only me
There is no you, there is only me
There is no fucking you, there is only me
There is no fucking you, there is only me
Only...................Only...............Only.........Only....
Only...............Only.............Only.........Only...

***

Blackness.
She woke up with a sudden thirst.

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